What is the Freeze Response?
When we experience a real or perceived threat, our nervous system automatically shifts into survival mode. One of the ways it protects us and keeps us safe is through the freeze response. Freeze isn’t a failure or a choice, it’s biology. It’s an adaptive response that happens when the body senses that fighting back or escaping isn’t possible.
Many people feel deep shame about freezing, especially after trauma. Survivors often ask themselves, “Why didn’t I do something?” or “Why couldn’t I move or speak?” The freeze response is not a weakness— it’s your nervous system doing exactly what it was designed to do to keep you alive.
When the nervous system moves into freeze, the body may feel immobilized, numb, disconnected, or exhausted. Some people may experience mental fog, detachment, or feeling far away from their emotions or body. Others notice physical symptoms like heaviness, fatigue, or difficulty speaking or moving.
Freeze can happen during traumatic events, such as sexual assault, abuse, or overwhelming childhood experiences, and it can continue afterward as the body’s way of staying protected, even once the danger has passed.
From a Polyvagal Theory perspective, developed by Dr. Stephen Porges, our nervous system responds to safety and threat through three main pathways. These responses are not choices, they are automatic, unconscious survival reactions shaped by our experiences, especially in early relationships and trauma.
The 3 nervous system states include:
Ventral Vagal (Parasympathetic- Social Engagement System): this state is active when we feel safe, connected, and present. It supports calmness, communication, emotional regulation, and connection with others.
Sympathetic Nervous System (Fight or Flight): this state mobilizes the body for action when there is danger, preparing us to fight back or escape. It involves increased heart rate, heightened alertness, and mobilization.
Dorsal Vagal (Parasympathetic- Freeze/Shutdown): when the nervous system senses that fighting or fleeing isn’t an option, it goes into freeze. This can look like immobility, numbness, low energy, dissociation, collapse, or shutdown. The body conserves energy and reduces pain and awareness as a way of protection.
Sometimes freeze is a mix of systems: dorsal vagal shutdown + sympathetic activation underneath. This is why people can feel frozen and anxious at the same time, or numb and hypervigilant.
Many trauma survivors carry shame around freezing, especially in situations like sexual assault or abuse. Society often reinforces the belief that survival means fighting back or escaping, but this is not how the nervous system works under threat or danger.
Freeze is not consent. Freeze is not compliance. Freeze is not failure.
It is a biological survival response that happens automatically when the nervous system detects overwhelming danger.
Unmet emotional needs, such as chronic feelings of rejection, abandonment, or loneliness can also trigger the freeze response. This often stems from early childhood attachment experiences and can be reactivated later in life, such as in current relationships.
Healing shame begins with understanding that your body responded intelligently, even if it doesn’t feel that way now. When we reframe freeze as a protective response rather than a personal flaw or choice, self-blame can begin to soften.
Working with freeze often involves moving slowly, building safety in the body, and restoring a sense of choice and agency, rather than pushing or forcing change. Trauma-informed therapy, somatic approaches, and nervous system regulation can help the body learn that the danger has passed.
Dr. Stephen Porges suggests that moving out of the freeze response involves gently activating the ventral vagal system which supports feelings of safety, connection, and social engagement.
When we feel regulated and safe enough, the ventral vagal system helps calm our physiological state and allows the nervous system to shift out of the freeze/shutdown.
Some practices he recommends include:
Co-Regulation: connecting with others in a calm, supportive way to foster safety
Orienting to the Environment: slowly looking around your space and engaging the senses (sight, touch, sound, smell, taste)
Music or Sound: listening to soothing music or nature sounds
Light & Warmth: spending time in soft natural lighting or warm environment can create a sense of comfort
Visualization: imagining a safe or peaceful place or memory
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